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Diaries of a Baseball Virgin III: Stanton please do more baseball things

Diaries of a Baseball Virgin III: Stanton please do more baseball things

Dear Diary,

Shout out to baseball man it’s fun.

I actually have done real fantasy GM things this week. I moved players around and benched players that were struggling, I hoped my bench would give me a spark.

It’s probably why I’m currently losing 8-1. Hahahaha fuck, help please.

My fantasy experience so far is kind of like that one scene in Catch Me If You Can where Dicaprio fakes his way into being a doctor and then has to do actual doctor things when a kid comes in with his leg literally split in half.

 

That’s where I’m at now.

I’m kind of just doing things on the fly with no actual knowledge of anything.

I got offered a trade and part of me wants to do it but part of me is also just wondering if my friends are bullying me into making bad trades because I don’t know how to baseball properly.

Both Stanton and Encarnacion are being weirdly inconsistent and not as good as they should be. I think I’ll keep Stanton because he is one of the better hitters in the game, but I’m open to exploring trading away Encarnacion.

But also I might just be going through the fantasy owner stage of “this guy is so fucking trash right now but like he can turn it on at any moment and I probably shouldn’t trade him, but also stop striking out.”

Still, urges to make impulsive trades aside, I feel like I’m learning. I’ve watched like 2-3 games a day for a couple days so I’m definitely getting into baseball and damn, BASEBALL IS WILD.

There were two bench clearing brawls yesterday which is insane because coming from an NBA fan the only access to violence I have is Lebron being mean to rims and Robin Lopez fighting mascots.

Also I watched a sports science video that showed that Stanton’s legs generated 500 lbs of power.

HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU STRIKING OUT SO MUCH THEN???

You can literally break a block of cement with your feet can you please do good baseball things now.

I’ll keep doing my best to get into and learn baseball, and two months from now I’ll reread this and cringe because I traded Encarnacion and he went on to average the MLB equivalent of a triple double.

Such is life.

XOXO,

Baseball Virgin

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